Embrace the mess……
These words I’ve heard spoken from one mother to another as I silently rolled my eyes to myself, now echo in my ears.
The house can wait…..
Sure! Live in filth I used to think. Now I sit here staring at socks on the floor next to a random wrapper of some mysterious snack my toddler ate days ago.
Self-care is important….
“It’s just a coffee! It’s just a shower!” I used to think, but here I am savoring every drop dreading the end of this magical cup.
I sit here, now a mom of two, nursing and cuddling my two-month-old while I watch her big sister chew on a window sticker that I’m too tired to redirect her from. I sit here and stress and enjoy all at the same time. To worry yourself to the brink of hair falling while simultaneously being overjoyed to the point of tears, still baffles me. These sayings I thought were nonsense now repeat through my mind like an old record playing over and over again.
Self-Care:
You see on our way back from the doctor today my head began to pound due to lack of sleep and general motherhood symptoms. So, to the coffee shop we went. I kept telling myself “You have coffee at home.” But the mere thought of making it myself was overwhelming. Needless to say, I indulged in my basic mom, Fall Spice latte. Because self-care is the little INTENIONAL things added up and is so very important. The extra five minutes in the shower, the whipped topping on your coffee. These little intentional choices are the things that keep that mom brain going.
The house can wait:
The house can wait: See, it’s our anniversary weekend and I go back to work on Monday. It’s so funny being a mom. This constant feeling of needing to do more and be more. I worry about the house being cleaned and ready for me to go back to work, but I’m stressed about all the cuddles I’ll miss. I just cleaned this house spotless Monday! It’s been three whole days! But here I am, cuddling my youngest, soaking up every moment like it’s my last and staring at the mess. The guilt of not cuddling my youngest enough because, well #toddlerlife and I didn’t have a toddler running around when I had my oldest, is overwhelming while matched with the need to keep a clean home for my family. I opted for the cuddles. The house won’t fall down if I don’t sweep and mop today, but she will grow. With the added mess is the added memories. So, I cuddle and hum and hush while breathing in her sweet scent.
So I sit here and Embrace the Mess:
The mess that shows we live life here, that my toddler plays and learns here. The bottles that need washed but show my baby if fed and happy. The mess that is our life right now. The mess of me and my toddler playing tag. The baby’s bows everywhere. The memory of my toddler posing a bow on her sister’s head declaring HAT proudly.
See, this is our season. Our season of life. As I long for the days that my babies sleep through the night and are more independent, I already miss the little milestones of yesterday. So, embrace the mess, the house can wait and do a little self-care along the way. This motherhood journey is tough and wonderful and exhausting. Scary and painfully rewarding.
Good luck momma. Just know those babies love you, and they don’t see the mess, they see memories.
